Anonymous Confessions

2456726

Comments

  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I've been having kind of an affair with one of my friends, who has a girlfriend, who is also my friend but a distant one, for nearly a year. He's been with her for nearly 4 years and she's still a virgin and will barely do anything with him. We've never done anything physical, it's only ever been through text/Skype and only because after every time an "occurrence" happens, he apologizes profusely for his behaviour, so I know if anything were to happen in person he'd probably lose his PIZZZAA or something. I know I'm being used. I used to mind it, and maybe I still mind a little. But I'm using him for my own ends too. I believe I've gotten my karma in the forms of dry socket after my wisdom teeth removal and my car breaking down a few days ago, a day after the last occurrence, among other things."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • RialVestroRialVestro Posts: 6,256 ✭✭✭
    Um... That's not an affair. He's the one who has a girlfriend, so he would be the one having an affair, that is if he actually did anything with you. Being that you're just talking and nothing else has happened there's no affair. I mean it could be if he's trying to flirt with you but from the sound of it you're just talking which is no big deal. On the other hand if something DOES happen between you, DO NOT GO OUT WITH HIM. I've had experience with this before. If this guy really is cheating on his girlfriend with you chances are you're not the only other girl. I knew a guy who was sleeping with four different women all at the same time. He was married to one of them and they have two kids but does he care? Nope. I thought he was my friend and one of the girls I introduced him to AS MY GIRLFRIEND, but did he care? No! Never go out with a guy willing to cheat on his girlfriend. He doesn't care about anyone but himself and isn't going to care who he hurts as long as he can get you in bed with him. He may even claim to have changed but this is still just a ploy to get you to sleep with him. Under no circumstances should you ever date a cheating douche bag.
    Ni, peng, nee-wom! Ecky, ecky, ecky, pakang, zoom-ping! Baa weep grahna weep ninny bong!
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I've come to realize the college I'm going to isn't right for me, there are no nerds. But I'm afraid to leave and start over somewhere new. And the boy I'm in love with lives in the area of my current school. Not that he loves me anymore. (Has a new girlfriend but still has sex with me) Leaving means the possibility of never seeing him again."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • shaileeshailee Sri LankaPosts: 233 ✭✭✭
    "I've come to realize the college I'm going to isn't right for me, there are no nerds. But I'm afraid to leave and start over somewhere new. And the boy I'm in love with lives in the area of my current school. Not that he loves me anymore. (Has a new girlfriend but still has sex with me) Leaving means the possibility of never seeing him again."
    No matter how much you may have to give up, just move, leave, all that. He's using you, and you may be okay with it now, once it all ends, you are going to feel disgusted of your self. And that feeling is really not something you can get over. Don't do things that will make you look back and wish you hadn't done. If you can leave, just do so. You can't and shouldn't constantly turn over a new leaf, but when you can, just do
  • RialVestroRialVestro Posts: 6,256 ✭✭✭
    shailee said:
    "I've come to realize the college I'm going to isn't right for me, there are no nerds. But I'm afraid to leave and start over somewhere new. And the boy I'm in love with lives in the area of my current school. Not that he loves me anymore. (Has a new girlfriend but still has sex with me) Leaving means the possibility of never seeing him again."
    No matter how much you may have to give up, just move, leave, all that. He's using you, and you may be okay with it now, once it all ends, you are going to feel disgusted of your self. And that feeling is really not something you can get over. Don't do things that will make you look back and wish you hadn't done. If you can leave, just do so. You can't and shouldn't constantly turn over a new leaf, but when you can, just do
    What he said. Also like I told the other person, if he's sleeping with you when he has a girlfriend, he's probably sleeping with other girls too.

    Seriously how do A-Holes like that keep managing to sleep with any girl they want while the nice guys girls claim to actually want are forever friend zoned. Just stop going after guys you know are cheaters and date your best guy friend.
    Ni, peng, nee-wom! Ecky, ecky, ecky, pakang, zoom-ping! Baa weep grahna weep ninny bong!
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I just barely graduated high school and I know that I want to be an English teacher, but I'm struggling through anxiety about the future. My closest friends, teachers whom I revere, and my family have all expressed love toward me and admiration as well. But my self-opinion is damaged. I've failed classes since 6th grade, despite taking honors classes, being invited into gifted programs, taking on leadership roles, passing tests with flying colors, etc. I have been proud of myself and exuded confidence during certain points in my life, but those are all sparse moments. I've had depression loom over my head during most of my life. I spent most of my teenage years reading self-help articles profusely. I believe that much of my low-self opinion stems from my relationship with my father. I feel lucky to have one who provides very much for us, but he has never been emotionally present. Based on recent fights between he and my mother (whom I shut out), I've concluded that he sees his role as solely the provider. My mom is present, however she's overworked. Yet she tries hard to keep us happy, which adds to my guilt when I treat her unkindly. Dad abused her emotionally and hit her once. I believe that a lot of my low self-opinion also stems from my experiences at my church as a young kid. I grew up there, and the members were like family to me. When I was around 13, I became more rowdy, outspoken and generally angry. In response, some church members treated me like an outcast and "the wild child." I argued with Sunday school teachers a lot. No wonder I identified with Bart Simpson. Anyway, I still go there as one of the pastor's four kids, and things have cooled down. I'm currently an athiest (I used to be agnosic). High school was a great journey. I changed from a attention glutton to a melancholy teenager. I had my first girlfriend during my senior year, with whom I planned my future. But things went awry when I cracked after my worst fears came to light: that she loved her best friend more than she loved me. Looking back, I don't believe she did, but at the time, I was extremely paranoid. I broke up with her. We tried getting back together, but never did. She dated him to "make him happy" but during their pseudo-relationship, she and I hooked up a few times. I didn't have sex with her then, but I did while she and I were dating. Thing was that I didn't want to, but it happened twice. I was ashamed and confused. We still talk from time to time, but recently I've been ignoring her. I loved her. I don't know if I still do. I'm afraid of hurting her by telling her that. After all, I did promise I'd marry her and she seemed like the one. But then again, she was my first. I haven't let go, even though I have doubts about my love. Ugh. More shame. All of this—upon many other lost friends and failed attempts at big projects—have added to my shame. Right now, I talk to nobody outside of my family and listen to music all day while watching youtube videos. I'm terribly depressed. I know I have potential, but I don't know if I'll be able to gather myself before it's too late. I have to register for classes at a community college (my plans for my dream private college fell through), and the deadline's approaching soon. My parents are also expectin me to take my permit test in a few days, but I haven't had the motivation to study at all. I hate myself. I've considered suicide a few times and thoughts of suicide slip into my mind several times a day, but I don't plan on it. I doubt it'll happen because I lack the resources and because I don't want to go yet. But I'm stuck. I've fallen into a deep pit and dug myself deeper, but now I want out. If anybody has words of advice or encouragement, please email me at danneh7pi@gmail.com. I would appreciate it. Also, I really appreciate this confession thread. It helped me come to a few realizations, and it was an effective venting tool."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • RialVestroRialVestro Posts: 6,256 ✭✭✭
    You know I think the Anonymous part kinda looses itself when you give out your E-mail in your confession. There's actually a lot of stuff in there that don't make any sense to me. Like at one point you said you barely passed high school but then you go on to claim you were doing really well in all these advanced classes. I was in special ed and was failing two of my classes. I made up the grades and still graduated but that's what barely passing is like.

    You also say you're mom is very supportive but you've shut her out. Your dad actually does seem like a jerk but why are you being so hard on your mom for. As far as I can tell she doesn't deserve it and you seem to already know that.

    Then there's the fact that you go to Church every week but you're Atheist? What is it with you, every other statement seems to contradict the last.

    From what I can tell you have no reason to be hard on yourself or to even think about suicide. Most of your life seems to be going well at least from what you've shared. You're dad is a jerk, you didn't get into the college you wanted, and you broke up with your girlfriend who you still have feelings for. These are the worst things in your life right now. Here's my advice.

    You said your dad hit your mom once. You can call the call the cops and press charges on him for that. Well actually I think she would need to but you really need to talk to your mom.

    You can always get into another college. Don't worry about it if you didn't get your first choice.

    As for the girlfriend thing... you broke up with her... she moved on and you should too. It's a high school crush and really it is extremely rare that anyone ever finds the right person when they're in high school.

    I don't mean to sound insensitive or anything but it really sounds like you're complaining about nothing. You have it pretty good and yet you can't even see it. Every teenager your age goes threw this anxiety about the future. I even went threw it but I also had real problems to deal with. I'm so freaking shy around girls that I didn't even have a girlfriend when I was your age. I've suffered constant physical pain for my whole life. I actually lost touch with reality for 3 years of my life. I was late for class a few times because I was fighting monsters on the play ground. The adults thought I was just pretending but at that time to me it was real. I had to deal with insomnia, multiple personality disorder, an abusive mother, and a racist uncle. My best friend cheated on his wife with my ex-girlfriend while I was still dating her. Him and his wife have abused their kids who I'm not allowed to see anymore because he's mad at me for telling her that he was sleeping with other women. My nephew's birthday is tomorrow and I can't even see him. My ex made out with another guy right in front of me while we were still dating. Her son has Cerebral Palsy, his father wants nothing to do with him. I've been the only male role in his life for the past 5 years, he thinks I'm his dad even though that's impossible. He has a freaking feeding tube which I never wanted him to get, I was told he wouldn't need it as long as he could keep his weight up but he got it anyway and they're still harassing her about his weight. I hate her for how she's treated me but I can't abandon him even though it hurts me to see him with that stupid thing. So yeah it's kinda hard to empathize with you right now when you have no reason to feel depressed. I've been feeling like breaking down all week and the closer it gets to my nephew's birthday the more I want I want to cry.

    I hope this puts some perspective on things for you. You think you have it bad but you really don't.
    Ni, peng, nee-wom! Ecky, ecky, ecky, pakang, zoom-ping! Baa weep grahna weep ninny bong!
  • lovelikeangelslovelikeangels ValyriaPosts: 276 ✭✭✭
    preach.
    just because someone's problems might be considered "first world problems" doesn't make them any less or any more important than anyone else's. 
    we all have our own battles to fight, the last thing anyone needs is judgement. 
    If you are plagued by externals, it is not they who trouble you, but the importance you give them.
    Marcus Aurelius
  • TeajTeaj The Kingdom of CanadaPosts: 19,071 ✭✭✭✭
    @ the last person, I'm e-mailing you :)

    @Rialvestro I would rant at you about what you are clearly misunderstanding, but there is no point, and I don't want to start an argument, but please, don't say someone is over reacting to their situation because, frankly, there is no such thing, if someone sees something as bad, IT IS BAD FOR THEM that is all.
  • RialVestroRialVestro Posts: 6,256 ✭✭✭
    Just so you know the person who posted that messaged me and cleared up the misunderstandings. I wasn't really trying to say I have it worse I just couldn't figure out what their problem actually was. You guys are making a bigger deal of my post than the person you're trying to defend.

    Plus I did admit that I was probably being insensitive without really meaning too. I really am going threw a hard time right now and I picked the wrong moment to unload a lot of feelings that I've had bottled up for a long time. I've already apologized to the poster for that and the person didn't even really seem to be offended by it in the first place but I still apologized.
    Ni, peng, nee-wom! Ecky, ecky, ecky, pakang, zoom-ping! Baa weep grahna weep ninny bong!
  • TeajTeaj The Kingdom of CanadaPosts: 19,071 ✭✭✭✭
    This might just be me, but I just found it annoying that you would seem to belittle someones problems based on your own. Sorry, though, you're right that we all made a big deal out of it when we shouldn't have.
  • D7KD7K MinnesotaPosts: 18
    edited August 2013
    I'm sure RialVestro understands that he could have dealt with it better, so people should stop berating him. He apologized to me for specifically dismissing my problems, and we're on good terms. I was the one who posted the confession that included the email. I appreciate the support you all gave me by sticking up for me, but I believe that RialVestro has a good heart, like many of you.

    I joined Nerdfighteria in hopes of finding an awesome community of people. If you guys all turn on someone for making one mistake, that doesn't decrease world suck any more than it increases it, imo. It's tougher to be compassionate toward somebody you disagree with, but damn it, if I can suck it up and apologize to RialVestro for my miscommunications, and if he can apologize to me for dismissing my problems, you guys can show compassion, too. DFTBA! :)

    Also, I admit that I miscommunicated a lot of things in my post. I realized that while I was trying to vent in this thread, I was also seeking for help. I found that the "Nerdfighters going through a hard time" thread was more helpful, and I urge anyone who is considering posting a confession in here to go check that one out. It's filed under General Discussion.

    EDIT: Although, this thread is helpful for venting, especially because it's anonymous. The creator set up a good system, so if you are considering posting a confession, you should. But you probably shouldn't post your email in an anonymous thread, like I did. :/ Defeats the purpose.
    by D7K
    "Trying and giving up are a form of breathing."—John Frusciante
    "Solitude is a hard won ally, faithful and patient."—Henry Rollins
    "If you're going through hell, keep going."—Winston Churchill
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    I know this whole debacle has been settled, but I feel like I should still link to this tumblr post that I feel is really relevant where John Green talks about having "silly and small" personal problems.
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I love water and I love swimming but at the same time I'm afraid of it,mainly of not being about to sea(haha pun) the bottom and thinking that something is going to come out and kill me.I feel like I can only swim when people are around me."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I know you love me, but I also know I'm just not what you want."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "Dear people who are worried about being virgins, my opinion may not matter to you,but I think that when you "do the deed" it should be with someone you truly love and want to be with, not with just anyone so that you're no longer a virgin.What your giving to that person is a lot,and when you finally have that person who you can trust and love and never let go of (and vise versa),then do it.You don't want to look back and say that you regret that person being your first."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I have depression, and I have finally figured out what triggers the worst of it. Hanging out with friends and family while we are supposedly having fun. I hide it so as not to ruin the fun, but whenever I spend any time with people in a supposedly enjoyable setting I end up feeling depressed and crying when I get or am able to do so without them seeing. ...even when I'm the one that set up the event. To be clear, I don't want cries of 'I've been through that' it makes me feel worse because it makes me feel weak or something... I just want it out there."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I used to always be fascinated with the idea of what I would see in the Mirror of Erised. I'd spend a lot of time wondering exactly what was my heart's deepest desire. And then my mother died. Now I know exactly what I would see in that mirror."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I think you and I are kindred spirits."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I'm jealous of my 5 month old nephew. He means the world to me but I hate it when people say he matters more than I do. I get that he is little but it just makes my depression worse. I hate the attention he gets and I feel so bad for feeling this way."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • RialVestroRialVestro Posts: 6,256 ✭✭✭
    To the above, it's not that he matters more than you do, just that he's younger and needs more attention than you do. You can pretty much take care of yourself by now where as he can't. If someone has literally said the words "he matters more than you do" they're wrong. There's a big difference between he matters more, and he needs more attention because he can't take care of himself. I'm not sure who but someone needs to learn that distinction.
    Ni, peng, nee-wom! Ecky, ecky, ecky, pakang, zoom-ping! Baa weep grahna weep ninny bong!
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "My friend has been sick for a while and she has less than a month left to live. I want to be there for her, but I don't know what to do. I just want her to be happy but I don't know how to do that. I can't even trust myself not to break down and make her feel worse. What are good ideas to make people happy? I just want to do something with her that she'll enjoy."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • RialVestroRialVestro Posts: 6,256 ✭✭✭
    To the above, just be with her while you can. Even if you break down it's better than avoiding her. You won't be able to get this time back so make the most of it. As for what you should do together, ask her. Everyone is different so she'd be able to answer that a lot better than a bunch of random strangers on the internet who have no idea what her interests are.
    Ni, peng, nee-wom! Ecky, ecky, ecky, pakang, zoom-ping! Baa weep grahna weep ninny bong!
  • turdl38turdl38 Posts: 976 ✭✭✭
    I'm missing something or perhaps just too tired to be smart at the moment, but...how do I submit to have it posted anonymously (or anonymous-ish, anyway.  I realize that whoever the "confessions" person is will potentially know who I am, but oh well)?
    Difficult does not mean impossible.  Very little is impossible if you want it badly enough.
  • another_bibliophileanother_bibliophile Canada Posts: 43
    to the person above,the same thing happened to me.If you go to the first page of this conversation,it's the first comment(well technically not a comment,it was posted by the person who started this,so it's the first thing posted in this conversation) and it's like an introduction to what this conversation is and in the introduction theres a part where it says submit it here or something like that and I'm pretty sure that if you click the "here" (in the intro) something should pop up so that you can make your confession.
  • RialVestroRialVestro Posts: 6,256 ✭✭✭
    The confession person doesn't actually know who's submitting the confessions. There are no user names or anything when you click on the link. He or she can read them and they basically just copy and past whatever the confession was in this topic still with no one having any idea who wrote it.
    Ni, peng, nee-wom! Ecky, ecky, ecky, pakang, zoom-ping! Baa weep grahna weep ninny bong!
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "Everyone says they have the greatest friends. I wish I felt the same way about mine."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
  • ConfessionsConfessions Posts: 357 ✭✭✭
    "I still cut fairly often. It's a coping mechanism for unbearable physical pain and even less bearable emotional pain. I just don't let you see it or know it anymore. I really don't go deep, just deep enough to see blood and cause a minor endorphin rush."
    Submit your anonymous confession here.
    (If a confession has NRP at the end of it, it means "No Responses Please.")
Sign In or Register to comment.