1/4 INTRO 3/4 PANIC OVER P4A PERK QUESTION! o.O

CoraCora Ontario, CanadaPosts: 5
edited January 9 in General Discussion
Never have I experienced such a daunting moment as viewing my “Submit Your Question!” button for the 2016 P4A Exclusive Dear Hank & John video.

I spent much of my adolescence being dumb… I was particularly dumb about reading… Like it took me reading the same sentence multiple times to grasp what information that sentence contained. But when I stumbled upon The Fault In Our Stars by John Green in 2014, I found a new love. His writing was in such a way that it felt more like a conversation to me, than a novel... His writing lead me to enjoy other author's writing like Maureen Johnson (via Let it Snow), and to just enjoy reading in general, gaining me a book collection that has my bookshelf busting at the seams and when my parental and life duties take me away from reading for too long I find a deep well of depression. For that, I want to thank John Green.

After becoming a serious fan of John Green books and wanting to know more, I also discovered Vlogbrothers, and that I had already seen Hank on a regular basis through my husband’s obsession with SciShow (which also contributed to making me less dumb). I have to say though that both Hank AND John are on my "guilt free three list." (I should specify that any happily married person like myself, Hank, or John for example, understands that the "guilt free three list" is purely a fun joke to show admiration for certain people - not an open agreement to cheat on each other if the opportunity arises -- that would never be okay.)

Unfortunately I have many flaws, not just a delayed reader flaw. I have a high level of “social” anxiety. My anxiety isn’t limited to real life “social” situations, but also includes online ones, oh and phone calls are especially gut-wrenching. (Though if John and/or Hank were to call me, I have to say I would get over my anxiety real fast to talk to them in real life – or at least I would have an extreme reason to want to get over it.) So this anxiety has kept me from approaching the Nerdfighter community. I have watched the player count on the Nerdfighteria Minecraft server, anxiously waiting for the player count to be 0 so I could safely check it out without fear. I have watched nerdfighter conversations, listened to nerdfighter stories and wished so desperately that I could be a vocal and active nerdfighter. But alas my anxiety has riddled me with fear of being too mediocre, lame, or un-nerdy to fit within the nerdfighter community – which I know is as ridiculous as it sounds, but that is anxiety for you.

So here I am with this opportunity to ask Hank and John absolutely anything, and I am frozen. I am like the deer caught in the headlights, unsure of what move to make next. I get one question – that they may or may not even answer, and I am so afraid of screwing it up (thanks anxiety), that I am stressing (and exciting!!) myself almost to an absurd degree of stress.

So I suppose this stress is crushing my anxiety enough for me to FINALLY reach out and ask the nerdfighter community a question; is there even a question they haven’t been asked already?

NOTE: Hitting "Post Discussion" is the most nauseating thing I've done in a while, and took over a day to do... So if my responses are slow - blame my old foe, Anxiety.
by Cora

Comments

  • Gara_the_engineerGara_the_engineer In a log house at the edge of the forestPosts: 601 ✭✭✭
    Have you previously felt that you've wanted to ask them questions, and what have those questions been? Is any of those something you would like to hear their answer about or thoughts on?
    I'm pretty sure that a lot of the people who, in one way or another, get the opportunity to ask them something will have more than one thing they want to ask, and whatever they choose, they'll ask themselves afterwards why they didn't pick another one, because they wanted an answer to that too. You'll have to accept that, if you have multiple things you would want to ask them about, that one thing will have to be enough, and accept whatever choice you make.
    On the subject of what to ask: do you want to learn a new thing about them or rather get some advice on something in your own life? Does your mind regularly wonder something about them that you could ask them? Or do you have things in your own life, however big or small, that you would like to hear their thoughts on?

    p.s. Hello, Anxiety. I know you pretty well, although I'm trying my best to cut our ties. Stop being such a PIZZZAA to Cora. You're not being helpful.

    p.p.s. Cora, don't let Anxiety hear this, but: whatever he may say about things, they still tend to be both survivable and possible to deal with the results of whatever thing it is you want to do but Anxiety hindering you from. It may not be easy and it may feel terrible, but it will pass, and you will have done it, and you will survive it.
    The meaning of life is to give life a meaning
  • Gara_the_engineerGara_the_engineer In a log house at the edge of the forestPosts: 601 ✭✭✭
    Oh, and I missed to answer your actual question in your post... I guess most general questions have been asked, in one way or another, although many weird ones have yet to be discovered. But does it matter if your question is something that have already been asked? There are many things humankind will keep asking itself forever, and keep trying to find answers to. That is not a bad thing, it only means that it's one of the core questions of being human. And I think that it's okay to be human?
    The meaning of life is to give life a meaning
  • CoraCora Ontario, CanadaPosts: 5
    I like your points/questions, and they certainly help me think about how to approach a decision in the end – though thankfully I have until the 22nd. I still have a lot of thinking to do, but this really helps – thank you!!

    I’d like to say, I’ve proven time and time again to myself that you are 100% right about anxiety. (But shhhh he’s listening.) Finally posting in my pants after almost 3 years, would be a prime example of how anxiety made something feel ridiculous and impossible, but I managed to overcome. And until I received your response I was frantically searching for the delete button, or rather anxiety was searching for it. Thankfully, it could not be found, because I really liked having an answer from an actual person that knows and enjoys vlogbrothers as much, or even more than I do.

    It doesn’t matter really if my question has been asked before or not, you're right - we're all human. I suppose I would just hate to think that I “wasted” the opportunity on something that was already answered, especially something that has been answered MULTIPLE times… like “What’s your favourite Beattle?” – “John” – “What’s your favourite colour?” – “Green."
  • Gara_the_engineerGara_the_engineer In a log house at the edge of the forestPosts: 601 ✭✭✭
    If you want to avoid questions that are already asked, you could watch their question Tuesday videos? It's definitely not all of the questions they've gotten, but it's a start.
    The meaning of life is to give life a meaning
  • CoraCora Ontario, CanadaPosts: 5
    Lol, I almost wish I had thought of that, only then I would have missed a lot. I've actually been sort of "binge watching" them from the start lately. My idea of "binge watching" though is just having something on while I work (art), or do chores. I wouldn't know how to just sit still and watch a show if I went to a college for it, haha. But it works because one, it's highly entertaining, and two, I'm slowly understanding more and more with each year of vlogbrothers I get through (I think 3 so far?) - it's so jokes.
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